Loving husband, beloved dad, and caring grandpa John E. McMillen (Jay), passed away on October 31st at the age of 72 in Gilbert, AZ. He was born in Rochester, NY on October 5th, 1950, son of late John E. and Margaret McMillen. Jay is survived by his wife of 33 years, Cassandra, his children Bo (Debbi), Lauren (Tracie), Katey (Kevin) and Zach (Zoe), his brother Kevin, dear cousin Charlie Goodwin (Gail), 9 grandchildren and several brother- and sister-in-laws, nieces and nephews. He was preceded in death by his parents John and Margaret, his siblings John, Margaret, Sheila and Sharon, his son Sean, his grandchildren Jaxx and Kynnlie and sister-in-law Ann McMillen. Memorial services will be held at Whitney & Murphy Funeral Home (4800 E Indian School Rd. Phoenix, AZ 85018) on Saturday, November 19th at 11am. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation (JDRF) through their site jdrf.org.
Jay graduated from Sacred Heart Grammar School and Aquinas Institute High School in Rochester, NY. He moved to Phoenix, AZ in the 1970s and married his wife Cassandra in 1989 at Greasewood Flats in Scottsdale, AZ. Together they built a beautiful life raising their 5 children. Jay lived his life as a man of giving and teaching. He dedicated his time to his family, his friends, and his church. He taught his kids the fundamentals of baseball and basketball then proceeded to coach them all to continue their development. Jay taught them countless life skills from riding a bike, to positivity, confidence, and driving a car. In 2015, life took Jay and Cassndra to Gilbert, AZ where Jay enjoyed spending time with his grandchildren, cheering on the horses, watching the Cardinals, Suns and Diamondbacks games, and attending plays at Hale Theater. Jay spent 30+ years in the commercial insurance industry working at Lumberman’s Underwriting Alliance where he would travel all over the Southwest, bringing his wife and children along whenever he could. Each summer he made a point to travel with his family to a different baseball stadium and was known as someone who loved introducing people to new places and experiences.
Special gratitude to the caregivers and staff at Valliant Hospice & Palliative Care for providing care in Jay’s last weeks ensuring his comfort so he could spend his last moments with family. Condolences may be expressed at www.whitneymurphyfuneralhome.com
Mary Malinka
Jay was a good friend to Pat and I for over 50 years. We had some wonderful times together and created a lot of memories. Our families are forever happily linked. RIP my friend and love and prayers to the entire family. You will be missed
Matthew
Jay thank you for giving me family value.
Growing with close cousins and family traditions has made me a better person to my own family.
Pat has been waiting on you and I’m happy he has his friend now. We will miss you. Have a toast, and be patient. We will all eventually make our return home.
Carole Crevier
So many fond memories. Breakfast on Christmas morning , Easter Sunday picnics, Friday night fish fries at Patti’s Place, enjoying cool breezes in the pines with our favorite next door neighbors in Heber. You were a great Dad, Husband and Friend. RIP and say hello to Uncle Pat and Roy.
RON
Casandra, my deepest condolences to you and the family. As you know, JAY and I go back a long time! I remember the great years at Sacred Heart especially PITCHING COINS against the wall of the school.Jay had the most LEANERS of all of us, LEANERS PAID DOUBLE MONEY! Then there were the BASKETBALL YEARS!!!! OUTSTANDING ! But the best memory I have about the two of us, was going to Mercy HS for reading classes! Our MOTHERS rotating driving us on the Sat. am’s. As I remember they did no good in helping us read! I know we hardly communicate, but at the reunion party, we picked things right up like it was yesterday! REST IN PIECE, MY OLD FRIEND!
Barbara Snell Grady
I am saddened by the loss of this great man. How fortunate he was to be loved by so many and to return that love. May his family and friends find comfort in memories and knowing that he is well and strong in heaven.
David Vieau
I met Jay 60 years ago when he moved to the west end of Seneca Parkway, a few doors away from where I lived. He had lost his father, and I observed how difficult that was, being a young man. And unlike anyone else I knew, Jay had sugar, diabetes. It was hard to believe that someone could live without soda and candy, but he did it. His uncle Bo, who was the chaplain for the New York Giants also had sugar and advised Jay to live his life as normal as possible, and not take the restrictions too seriously, so Jay broke the rules, but learned how to enjoy his life and that stayed with him.
We had a series of adventures in high school, with road trips to New York City, Niagara Falls, the thousand islands, and Ann Arbor, Michigan among others. He lit a fire in my entrepreneurial spirit, suggesting that we start a business doing yardwork for neighbors, which we did, and made extra money .
Above all, Jay uniquely maintained a positive attitude about life. It was contagious and it bonded me to him over our 60 year relationship.
I’m truly saddened by the loss of a great friend he will be missed.
Hop.